Totally wired: Why are so many young people addicted to video games?
2024-07-07
Battling Gaming Addiction: A Mother's Courageous Journey
Dee's world was turned upside down when the paramedics arrived at her doorstep in the middle of the night, responding to a call about her son Jake's suicidal thoughts. This harrowing incident was the catalyst that propelled Dee on a mission to save her son from the grips of gaming addiction, a battle that would test her resilience and reshape their family's future.
A Desperate Cry for Help: Uncovering the Depths of Gaming Addiction
The Midnight Knock: A Mother's Worst Nightmare
Dee's eyes still fill with tears when she recalls the fateful night the paramedics arrived at her door. The blaring ambulance and the lead medic's urgent question, "Is Jake home?" shattered the silence and Dee's sense of security. As she guided the paramedics to her son's bedroom, the gravity of the situation sank in. Jake, just 16 years old at the time, had spiraled into a dark place, and Dee was left grappling with the aftermath, her heart heavy with the weight of a mother's worst fear.
Unraveling the Chain of Events: A Troubling Trail of Breadcrumbs
In the days that followed, Dee pieced together the chain of events that had led to this crisis. It began the night before, when Dee had returned home late from her nursing shift and asked Jake to prepare a simple meal. Instead, he had retreated to his room, immersed in the virtual world of video games. Dee's frustration boiled over, and she confiscated his laptop, unaware of the emotional turmoil brewing within her son. The next day, Jake's messages to his girlfriend grew increasingly distressed, and she, fearing for his safety, had made the call that brought the paramedics to their doorstep.
A Son's Anguish: Heartbreaking Confessions and a Cry for Help
Dee's heart shattered as she later accessed Jake's phone and laptop, reading the anguished messages he had sent to his girlfriend and gaming community. "He's saying he feels useless, he is nothing," Dee recounts, her voice trembling. "It did not sound like my son." Dee's beloved only grandson, the cherished child of a close-knit family, was struggling with a deep sense of worthlessness, a far cry from the vibrant, loved boy she knew.
The Roots of Addiction: A Childhood Shaped by Distance and Technology
Dee's own journey as a single mother had played a role in Jake's gaming addiction. When Dee moved to the UK to work as an NHS nurse practitioner, she left Jake in the care of her mother and sister back in the Philippines. To stay connected, she provided Jake with a Game Boy Advance and a laptop, inadvertently sowing the seeds of his gaming obsession. As Jake grew older, his gaming habits escalated, consuming his every waking moment and isolating him from the real world.
A Deteriorating Spiral: Behavioral Changes and Neglect
Dee watched helplessly as Jake's behavior deteriorated. He became increasingly introverted, skipping meals to retreat to his room and neglecting his personal hygiene. "If I didn't prompt him to have a shower, he's not going to have a shower for a week or a month or whatever," Dee laments. Jake's academic performance also suffered, and he even got into trouble at school for physically restraining a female classmate, a troubling sign of his growing detachment from reality.
A Mother's Desperate Search: Navigating the Uncharted Terrain of Gaming Disorders
Determined to save her son, Dee embarked on a relentless search for help. She read about the newly established NHS National Centre for Gaming Disorders and reached out, but the service was not yet accepting patients. Undeterred, Dee sought private counseling and a tutor to address Jake's academic decline, but these interventions proved ineffective. As Dee's own health battle with cancer loomed, her focus remained steadfast on her son's wellbeing, a testament to the unwavering love of a mother.
A Glimmer of Hope: The National Centre for Gaming Disorders
Two years after her initial contact, Dee's persistence paid off. The National Centre for Gaming Disorders finally had the capacity to treat Jake, and when Alison Smith, a family psychotherapist, called to deliver the news, Dee was overcome with relief and gratitude. "It was everything," she recalls, her voice breaking with emotion. "At that time my son's wellbeing was far more important than my cancer. I don't care about that. When I got that call from Alison, I was in pieces. I said, 'My son needs help. Help him!'"
Overcoming Resistance: A Collaborative Approach to Treatment
Jake's journey to recovery was not without its challenges. He was initially resistant to the treatment, telling Dee that he had attended sessions when he had, in fact, skipped them. Dee's vigilance caught his deception, and she insisted on attending the sessions with him, along with her new partner, Peter. Together, they delved into the underlying issues, including Jake's unresolved feelings about his mother's decision to move to the UK when he was a child.
A Glimmer of Hope: Gradual Progress and a Renewed Sense of Purpose
As Jake engaged more consistently with the treatment, the tide began to turn. He started helping with household chores, and his academic performance improved. Now 21 years old, Jake is studying game design and programming at university, with the goal of creating video games that have a positive impact on mental health. Dee is cautiously optimistic, knowing that the journey is far from over, but she is grateful for the breakthrough the National Centre for Gaming Disorders has facilitated.
A Cautionary Tale and a Beacon of Hope: Lessons for Parents and Policymakers
Dee's story serves as a cautionary tale and a beacon of hope for parents navigating the complex landscape of gaming addiction. Her experience highlights the urgent need for greater awareness, resources, and support for families grappling with this growing challenge. Bowden-Jones, the founder of the National Centre for Gaming Disorders, acknowledges the overwhelming demand for their services, a testament to the scale of the problem. As policymakers and healthcare providers grapple with this emerging crisis, Dee's story underscores the importance of early intervention, comprehensive treatment, and a collaborative approach that addresses the multifaceted nature of gaming addiction.